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By Rosemary Pollock
LDS Mother Works to Prevent Teen Pregnancy
WILEY, COLORADO -- In an effort to pinpoint the pitfalls and point
out the monetary and human resources that are available to teenage
mothers, Violet Lane of Wiley, Colorado, has gone hundreds of miles
out of her way to help others avoid the perils of teenage pregnancy.
Lane, who became a mother when she was a 16-year-old high school
sophomore, now opposes premarital sex and relies on the beliefs and
ideals of her Mormon faith.
"I think the main reason for teen-age pregnancies is a lack of family
involvement," she said. Growing up, Violet's family was always on
welfare except for three brief years. "And it wasn't a comfortable
existence she said. While far from ideal, Lane's childhood wasn't
horrible. She was the youngest of three girls and a year old when her
father abandoned the family. Eight years later, Lane's mother was
stricken with lymphoma and at the age of 14, her grandmother was
murdered by a transient. Wrung out emotionally, Lane left public
school for home schooling.
Sex was an open subject in her home and Lane was aware of birth
control, but discipline in the home was inconsistent. Once when Lane
stayed out until 4 a.m. she was angrily grounded by her mother and
then allowed to attend a dance a few hours later. She and Braden, her
then boyfriend and now husband, had too much freedom and were often
unsupervised.
"They would let him come and stay the weekend at my house. Then, my
mother would let us go to my sister's house. "What kind of discipline
were we going to get there?" Lane asked. When her older sister got
pregnant at 15, Lane didn't think the same thing could happen to her,
but by the age of 16, Lane was a teenage mother.
"I didn't want to raise my kids on welfare. I didn't think it was
anybody else's responsibility to raise my kids," she said. Lane lived
through more ups and down with her baby's father before marrying him
and having two more children. During this time, he had a child with
another woman and Lane was faced with making her family a "yours and
ours" type.
Today, Violet and Braden Lane devote themselves to their four
children, their faith and their jobs. Violet helps run a Wiley
trucking firm and her husband works for the Colorado Department of
Transportation. They live on his parent's ranch near Wiley, where
they are building up a herd of cattle.
Lane doesn't hold herself out as a symbol of success as a teenage
mother. She said it wasn't easy to achieve what she has, but thinks
children deserve a more solid start then being raised by teen-age
parents. "If they are given enough information, they are able to keep
from getting pregnant and protect themselves from AIDS and other
sexually transmitted diseases," she said.
Abortion was not an option for Lane and she was determined not to
live on welfare. Lane is realistic about the sex laden culture we
live in and the fact that many teens lack the strong connections with
adults and church associations that would influence them to choose
abstinence before marriage.
Source:
Wiley mom travels far to relate her experience
Pueblo CO Chieftain 7Aug01 P2
By Karen Vigil: The Pueblo Chieftain
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